Plow Creek Mennonite Church
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A STORY OF ABUSE AND
HEALING
I grew up not remembering
a whole lot of my experiences as a
child. They were way too much to handle. The proper words are
dissociation and ritual abuse carried on by my family and the folks
they associated with. As a child, I survived because the Lord protected
me, body, mind, and spirit. I even managed to grow into a woman who
could function well among people much of the time, with the gift of a
strong healthy body. The healthy body came when the Lord healed me of
lupus when I was 27.
But that good gift was
only the beginning of His healing
work in me. My husband and I and our two sons moved to Plow Creek
Fellowship when I was 33 yrs. old, following a clear sense of the
Lord’s call to us. About 10 yrs. later, after the death of my mother, I
began to be too angry at our young sons and realized I needed help. I
had always known my relationship to my mother was not good, that she
was controlling and difficult to relate to, but had no memory of
anything I would call abuse. Receiving some prayer counseling opened up
memories of sexual abuse by my mother and uncle. They were very hard to
deal with, but I slowly made progress. Eight years later I thought I
had completed my work with my past abuse. Then in 2000 we learned about
Theophostic Prayer Ministry
and it seemed like a good way to help
others find some emotional healing. Our training and first attempts had
limited success, but my husband and I were wanting to know more so went
to a workshop led by Karl and Charlotte
Lehman on how to use this tool
better. We learned some things, but more importantly, I clearly heard
the Lord telling me I needed to work more on my own past and its pain.
I said “yes”. And Jesus became my very faithful guide throughout a 2
½ yr. process, working with experienced people who have walked
with me through a past that no one wants to claim as their own. The
tools of Theophostic prayer ministry have been much more effective than
my original 8 yrs. of healing work. The memories have been worse, but
my recovery time (the time of being really upset) has been much less.
Along the way, we were
introduced to another very good tool.
Theophostic Prayer ministry is excellent at dealing with the pain that
remains when we experience bad things in our lives, especially as
children. It seems to have some limitations for the pain we feel when
we just didn’t get a lot of the good stuff the Lord intended our
parents to provide for us. We attended a Thrive
Conference for a week.
These are held annually in Michigan and are the work of James Wilder.
His most recent book, Living with Men, also teaches some of the
principles. But the conference, with all its experiences, is able to
really help in ways that head knowledge from the book cannot. My other
resource, a very supportive husband and a community of people to pray
for me, has been invaluable all along the way.
I have had to rely on the
Lord countless times, trusting Him
to show the way. And He has never failed me in this journey. I am not
quite done yet with the ritual abuse memories, but have been able to
deal with so much and grow as the Lord has been leading in a very short
time. I am beginning to discover a whole new life of energy, of joy, of
being me in a way I have never known before. Jesus is truly our Healer
and our help. My prayer for you is that you too can come to know just
how much He loves you and the freedom He has for your life as well.
Blessings, Louise